the beautiful hard
Apologies for such a long silence here at Three Little Birds. The CEO has been a bit tied up this month! Truth be told, December has been a month of bridges; to cross, to build, to burn. I cannot reveal all that I'd like to say, but be assured that God is at work in me, in us, in His people.
Two days ago we received terrible news that our sweet Kali-dog was struck and killed by a car some days ago. We hadn't seen her since December 18th, and were putting out an APB to all the Dog Rescue people in Nassau. One young lady whom I've never met contacted me, put together an e-poster of Kali, including contact info, and then sadly informed me that Kali's collar had been found....on a dog near the edge of our neighborhood. The minute I saw the picture of her collar in the message, fear rose in my heart. How could it be her? She was the best pet we've ever had, by far. Sweet, loyal, truly "man's best friend" in the dog sense. We only had 18 months with her. Why was God doing this to our family?
Then yesterday, harder news came. Our dear friend and Kingdom Life Church member Keva, of whom I've written about here, passed into eternity yesterday morning at about 9:30am. She had gone into hospital about the same day Kali went missing and was suspected to have had a stroke. Keva has been in total kidney failure for about 5 years now and has been through deep waters each year since. Last year she spent over two months in the hospital and we thought for sure God would take her home to Jesus. But she recovered. Now she is with Him forevermore, no more pain. No more dialysis at 5 am. No more blood transfusions which used to creep her out. No more feet filling with fluid. No more hospital bills.
And for us, left behind in her great absence, no more radiant face to see each week, no more hearty hugs and laughs. No more care given by a woman who knew what it was to empathize. No more passionate worship coming from the very center of the church auditorium, hands raised, eyes closed, singing full-throated praises to God. How our hearts weep at this huge loss.
Two days ago we received terrible news that our sweet Kali-dog was struck and killed by a car some days ago. We hadn't seen her since December 18th, and were putting out an APB to all the Dog Rescue people in Nassau. One young lady whom I've never met contacted me, put together an e-poster of Kali, including contact info, and then sadly informed me that Kali's collar had been found....on a dog near the edge of our neighborhood. The minute I saw the picture of her collar in the message, fear rose in my heart. How could it be her? She was the best pet we've ever had, by far. Sweet, loyal, truly "man's best friend" in the dog sense. We only had 18 months with her. Why was God doing this to our family?
Then yesterday, harder news came. Our dear friend and Kingdom Life Church member Keva, of whom I've written about here, passed into eternity yesterday morning at about 9:30am. She had gone into hospital about the same day Kali went missing and was suspected to have had a stroke. Keva has been in total kidney failure for about 5 years now and has been through deep waters each year since. Last year she spent over two months in the hospital and we thought for sure God would take her home to Jesus. But she recovered. Now she is with Him forevermore, no more pain. No more dialysis at 5 am. No more blood transfusions which used to creep her out. No more feet filling with fluid. No more hospital bills.
And for us, left behind in her great absence, no more radiant face to see each week, no more hearty hugs and laughs. No more care given by a woman who knew what it was to empathize. No more passionate worship coming from the very center of the church auditorium, hands raised, eyes closed, singing full-throated praises to God. How our hearts weep at this huge loss.
But as I am here, stateside for a few weeks, I am able to get some perspective...away from it all. There is a beauty in the hard moments of this life. It cannot be replaced by easy moments. The treasures of the dark places, Isaiah calls it.
"I will give you the treasure of darkness and the hoards in secret places, that you may know that it is I, the Lord the God of Israel, who call you by your name." (Is. 45:3)
Hear Isaiah's further life-giving words: "When you walk through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior." (43:2-3) "Because you are precious in my eyes, and honored, and I love you, I give men in return for you, peoples in exchange for your life." (43:4) "The Lord is exalted, for he dwells on high; he will fill Zion with justice and righteousness, and he will be the stability of your times, abundance of salvation, wisdom, and knowledge; the fear of the Lord is Zion's treasure." (33:5-6)
I don't know about you, but my eyes well up with tears at these words of love, provision, and protection from God, my Heavenly Father, and Christ my Savior. You see, God tells us that it is IN the dark places that He gives treasure, so that we will KNOW it is He that is doing it, and nobody else. The world gives treasure in all the expected places...in the high moments of life. But only God can give treasure when all natural sources of hope and joy have expired. And that's just exactly how He works, always. Death becomes Life. Sickness becomes the bed on which we see Him more clearly as Healer...whether He physically heals or not... He is Healer. Financial hardship becomes the humble place of looking up to Him alone and all that He possesses. Loneliness becomes the deserted island inhabited by our God and Savior. It is there that He fills us with His presence, never leaving us or forsaking us so that we stop longing for mere human companionship. The ashes become beautiful with Him. The mourning turns to dancing with Him. The weary become soaring eagles with Him. Treasures in dark places...only God can do that. Creating where there should be emptiness. Speaking life...and it is. It's the beautiful hard. God alone specializes in it.
As C.S. Lewis said, "Reality, in fact, is usually something you could not have guessed. That is one of the reasons I believe Christianity. It is a religion you could not have guessed. If it offered us just the kind of universe we had always expected, I should feel we were making it up. But, in fact, it is not the sort of thing anyone would have made up. It has just that queer twist about it that real things have." Mere Christianity
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