haunting words...
This morning, as I do many mornings, I was addressing my children about their behavior. It was only breakfast and already sin was on full display. I have been lamenting the last week about how ungrateful these children can be to me as I cook, clean, shop, do laundry, and generally care for every little need they have. (Do you hear my pride yet?) So this morning it was more of the same and I struck them with these words, "For ones so needy, I am amazed at your level of ungratefulness!"
You see, I was listing to them the needs which they had been coming to me with all week,
"Mom, I don't have any clean underwear!"
"Mom, what can I eat for breakfast? I don't like those two cereals. That one I picked isn't what I thought it was, so I don't want it."
"Mom, can you take us to the park?" (I'm trying to pack here people!)
"Mom, can____come over to play?"
"Mom, can you take us to the pool?" (I'm still trying to pack.)
"What's for lunch? What's for dinner?"
"Can you take me shopping? I don't have any pants that fit."
Well, as I heard the words taking shape on my tongue..."for ones so needy...." I saw in a moment what a hypocrite I was. I am one who is so needy. I am one who has an amazing level of ungratefulness. The very words spilling out of my mouth should be directed right back at myself. "For while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8
What if Christ had waited for my gratefulness before he would save me? It would never have been! I will never be grateful enough. In fact, most days, I don't speak or act as if I'm grateful at all! How about you? One of the reasons I started following Ann Voskamp at www.aholyexperience.com and read her book, One Thousand Gifts, is because I am so deficient in this area. It has been said that a humble heart is a thankful heart. Well then, I'm....not humble? Precisely. And precisely what I was accusing my own children, flesh of my flesh, of being. Pridefully ungrateful.
Clearly in this, I am the bigger sinner. I have lived this way before my children and yet now accuse them of the very thing I hate in me. Oh, mercy! How can this be fixed? I know I don't have a calling to write volume 2 of Ann's book..."Two Thousand Gifts!" But I do have a calling to express thanksgiving to God. And sometimes I do. But I look at it as optional...or so I must. And it's not optional. It is a discipline just like this eating plan I'm on. Discipline is hard, especially at first. But the more we exercise it, the more our souls (and bodies, and minds, and hearts) grow content in it. It becomes life to us. Proverbs 6:23 says, "For the commandment is a lamp and the teaching a light, and the reproofs of discipline are the way of life...to preserve you..." Elsewhere in scripture we are told again and again, "Give thanks to the Lord..." It really is a command...even though it doesn't show up verbatim in the 10 Commandments. If I am loving God with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength, then I will be expressing gratitude to Him. Kinda like some children I know...whom I want to see express gratitude to me as a display of their love! Oh yeah....this is painful. I hate being the one with egg on my face. But there is grace from One who never waits for me to be grateful.
You see, I was listing to them the needs which they had been coming to me with all week,
"Mom, I don't have any clean underwear!"
"Mom, what can I eat for breakfast? I don't like those two cereals. That one I picked isn't what I thought it was, so I don't want it."
"Mom, can you take us to the park?" (I'm trying to pack here people!)
"Mom, can____come over to play?"
"Mom, can you take us to the pool?" (I'm still trying to pack.)
"What's for lunch? What's for dinner?"
"Can you take me shopping? I don't have any pants that fit."
Well, as I heard the words taking shape on my tongue..."for ones so needy...." I saw in a moment what a hypocrite I was. I am one who is so needy. I am one who has an amazing level of ungratefulness. The very words spilling out of my mouth should be directed right back at myself. "For while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8
What if Christ had waited for my gratefulness before he would save me? It would never have been! I will never be grateful enough. In fact, most days, I don't speak or act as if I'm grateful at all! How about you? One of the reasons I started following Ann Voskamp at www.aholyexperience.com and read her book, One Thousand Gifts, is because I am so deficient in this area. It has been said that a humble heart is a thankful heart. Well then, I'm....not humble? Precisely. And precisely what I was accusing my own children, flesh of my flesh, of being. Pridefully ungrateful.
Clearly in this, I am the bigger sinner. I have lived this way before my children and yet now accuse them of the very thing I hate in me. Oh, mercy! How can this be fixed? I know I don't have a calling to write volume 2 of Ann's book..."Two Thousand Gifts!" But I do have a calling to express thanksgiving to God. And sometimes I do. But I look at it as optional...or so I must. And it's not optional. It is a discipline just like this eating plan I'm on. Discipline is hard, especially at first. But the more we exercise it, the more our souls (and bodies, and minds, and hearts) grow content in it. It becomes life to us. Proverbs 6:23 says, "For the commandment is a lamp and the teaching a light, and the reproofs of discipline are the way of life...to preserve you..." Elsewhere in scripture we are told again and again, "Give thanks to the Lord..." It really is a command...even though it doesn't show up verbatim in the 10 Commandments. If I am loving God with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength, then I will be expressing gratitude to Him. Kinda like some children I know...whom I want to see express gratitude to me as a display of their love! Oh yeah....this is painful. I hate being the one with egg on my face. But there is grace from One who never waits for me to be grateful.
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